My son died.....

Coping with the loss of a loved one.
triciamarie1174
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My son died.....

Post by triciamarie1174 » Thu Jan 09, 2014 3:37 pm

I don't even really know what to say here, but I know I need to reach out.
My 19 year old son overdosed Sunday, December 29th. He was staying in a halfway house, and someone found him at 4:30 a.m. He was already gone, and there was nothing that could be done. It will be a while before we get the official cause of death, but the detective told us all signs look like a heroin overdose. He was staying in Florida, and we are from Illinois. He kept moving around looking for a new start, but couldn't run away from the addiction.
I kept hoping it was a mistake. I hoped that was the case, until I finally saw him the night of his visitation. I saw him, I touched him, I know that is my baby. I just can't bring myself to believe he is gone.

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DianeB
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Re: My son died.....

Post by DianeB » Thu Jan 09, 2014 4:15 pm

I am so very sorry. No words can express the pain of
losing a loved one. Much less a child.

May you and your family find peace.

Praying for peace and healing.

Hugs....
Hugs....

with Love

DianeB



“It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change.” - Charles Darwin

http://nar-anon.org

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EMPTY
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Re: My son died.....

Post by EMPTY » Thu Jan 09, 2014 4:17 pm

My Dear Triciamarie,

How very sorry I am to hear about your precious son. May the arms of God embrace you and hold you close. Words cannot articulate my sadness for you and your family.
I will pray your son is now with his HP and is no longer in pain.

With Much Love, Maddy

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Linda (lsv)
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Re: My son died.....

Post by Linda (lsv) » Thu Jan 09, 2014 5:46 pm

Please stay close during this terrible time. I am so sorry for your loss. I will have you all in my prayers.

Love,
Linda

BeeBee
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Re: My son died.....

Post by BeeBee » Thu Jan 09, 2014 5:55 pm

My son passed this past November too. I am so very sorry for your loss and I know your pain. I pmd you and wish you comfort and peace. I am still in shock as well.

Xoxoxo

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mertbow
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Re: My son died.....

Post by mertbow » Thu Jan 09, 2014 6:02 pm

Tricia, I am so sorry, my heart breaks for you. I lost my oldest son 15 years ago in a car accident, a pain no parent should ever have to endure... and I fear the loss of my AS everyday from this senseless, horrible disease that takes our loved ones, piece by piece, life by life.. I wrap my arms around you ((hugs)).. Keep us close we are here for you..

Meredith
"Nothing changes if nothing changes."

Forgive1
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Re: My son died.....

Post by Forgive1 » Thu Jan 09, 2014 6:15 pm

I am profoundly sorry for you and your family.
I hope you will find some peace in the happy memories you shared.
We are all here for such a short time.
All of us mourn the loss of our loved ones, no matter how long we have with them.
I am glad you have reached out.
I hope you will continue to come back.
We are here for each other.
May God bless you and your family,
Heidi

srv
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Re: My son died.....

Post by srv » Thu Jan 09, 2014 7:45 pm

So very, very sorry.

saide
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Re: My son died.....

Post by saide » Thu Jan 09, 2014 7:54 pm

I am so very sorry for your son's passing. This is a parents worst nightmare and I am sending prayers and hugs your way.

Laura
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Re: My son died.....

Post by Laura » Thu Jan 09, 2014 10:21 pm

My thoughts and prayers are with you. I pray you and your family find peace and healing.

Laura
Laura

"Rest if you must, but never quit". Anonymous.

Macringle
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Re: My son died.....

Post by Macringle » Fri Jan 10, 2014 4:33 am

I am so very sorry for your loss. I read your first post am I am so very very sorry for all of your losses. But as a parent with a son who is an addict I hurt the most for you with the loss of your son.

I believe that this life is not the end. I believe that your son has his new start, that he is free from his struggles. I am sure that he would want you to remember all the love and happiness you shared. Memories are ours forever, may you find comfort in the good ones and detach from the painful ones.

My heartfelt prayers for all of you, in this world and the next.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace.
-Reinhold Niebuhr



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jeanette
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Re: My son died.....

Post by jeanette » Fri Jan 10, 2014 9:45 am

my love to you and your family - may you have happy memories amidst your sadness and grief
Thoughts and Prayers, Peace and Love
Jeanette

I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them FEEL. - Maya Angelou

triciamarie1174
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Re: My son died.....

Post by triciamarie1174 » Fri Jan 10, 2014 11:52 am

Thank you, everyone. It helps to have such support right now.
I admit, I do find peace in knowing he isn't struggling anymore. He had deep emotional pain, and tried so desperately to treat it by using.
The fact that he is no longer hurting brings me peace. With that peace comes guilt. How am I supposed to be at peace when I just buried my son last week?
Unfortunately, the peaceful feeling doesn't last long, and then I am just wanting him back!!! All of this back and forth, sadness, shock, denial, anger.....I am exhausted.
I spent so much time with him being my main focus in life. I don't know what to do with myself. The worrying about him is over, but the pain of him being gone is unbelievable.

Thank you all for listening, and for your thoughts and prayers!

BeeBee
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Re: My son died.....

Post by BeeBee » Fri Jan 10, 2014 3:52 pm

Hi Tricia,

yes I know that lost feeling. I walked around lost in my own house for weeks. I started memorial books for all my sons close friends to send to them. Pictures of him with each of them, pictures of us all together, pictures of just him.. any newspaper clippings, the eulogy, any little items that might have meaning to them. I also started going through all of his clothes to wash, go through for any unwanted items in the pockets, etc. Started thank you notes. I have hundreds to write. It helps to write down a list and start crossing stuff off. Some days nothing gets crossed off. We have all his pictures still up from the Memorial Service. 6 giant 3" x 4" boards with hundreds of pictures on each of them all over the house. We light a candle for him every day and play songs that remind us of him.

We have had many of his friends over for dinner to share stories, food, and basically give each other comfort. It helps so much to connect with them. We are all hurting. And I come here. ALOT.

Do what feels right for you and gives you comfort. Whatever that is. If you have any pets, spend a lot of time with them. They will help you get through this too.

hugs Tricia, we will be ok.

xoxoxo

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Seahorse
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Re: My son died.....

Post by Seahorse » Fri Jan 10, 2014 7:10 pm

I am so sorry for your loss, may your dear son rest in peace. Please keep coming back, there is great understanding and support here, and much love. Hugs and prayers.
“Things do not change; we change.” -Henry David Thoreau

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