What do you say or text your ALO to show love & encouragement?

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melinda2016
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What do you say or text your ALO to show love & encouragement?

Post by melinda2016 » Wed Jan 18, 2017 3:39 am

Hi Nar Anon Family. Just wondered if you guys can post a response with what you say or text to your ALOs when you just want them to know you love them and are praying for them? I'm very confused on how to let go with love

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flash
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Re: What do you say or text your ALO to show love & encouragement?

Post by flash » Wed Jan 18, 2017 8:21 am

Hi - Pretty much I say something like - "I hope you know I love you and always will"
That's about it. When my son has had a big accomplishment I've often said I know what hard work it is and he should feel proud of himself.

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nayr333
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Re: What do you say or text your ALO to show love & encouragement?

Post by nayr333 » Wed Jan 18, 2017 10:38 am

I simply say " I love you "
I try my best not to really talk about the struggle. I have learned not to ask questions.

I might send a text " have a good day , thinking of you "

I have learned to detach with LOVE. for me it allows me to have peace in my life.

I love my son I HATE addiction.

Love
Karen
Nothing changes if nothing changes, Let it begin with me.

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Seahorse
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Re: What do you say or text your ALO to show love & encouragement?

Post by Seahorse » Fri Apr 07, 2017 9:07 pm

I tell him I love him. Also:
I know how hard the struggle is and I am proud of all your hard work
We are proud that you have chosen to work your program.

Mainly tell him we love him and support his efforts to remain sober.

The longer he is sober the more amazed he is that we have stuck with him.

When he is actively using we don't talk to him anymore.
“Things do not change; we change.” -Henry David Thoreau

DeanW
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Re: What do you say or text your ALO to show love & encouragement?

Post by DeanW » Sat Apr 08, 2017 6:40 am

I dunno. It depends on how comments I am making are being received!

My daughter isn't currently abusing drugs (jft) and I now have to deal with her sensitivity to my words. It was there in active addiction, too - but, so many other things overwhelmed that issue. For example, I have a habit of putting "xxoo" at the end of my texts to my family members - I don't do it all the time - but, often. Anyway, if I forget - or if it seems inappropriate to me - like I am just saying something about grandsons' school or something like that and I omit...she will often ask me if something is wrong.

She and I communicate differently. We have very different personalities, in general - and our life experiences very different. Sooo, I think about this a lot.

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Mel1983
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Re: What do you say or text your ALO to show love & encouragement?

Post by Mel1983 » Sat Apr 08, 2017 3:11 pm

I always tell mine that I am thinking of him, that I hope he is safe and that I love him. And then I have to force myself to shut the sound off on my phone and put it away. Otherwise I keep checking constantly and that will drive me nuts.
;) Mels

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Lilacsnmay14
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Re: What do you say or text your ALO to show love & encouragement?

Post by Lilacsnmay14 » Mon Apr 10, 2017 9:27 pm

I say to her "I love you, I believe in you and I will never give up on you".
All that wander are not lost

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