This section is for friendship related discussion such as sports, recipes, jokes, birthday wishes, etc. We DO Recover.
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option_firstname: Theresa

Re: How Do I Cope With the Not Knowing?

Post by Twhitelightner » Fri Dec 30, 2016 9:12 pm

So happy that you are here!
Not knowing seems to be one of the most challenging things for me as well.
Once my Addicted Significant other was in church with me. A few minutes later
she was gone. The waiting of that day was so so difficult. I prayed and prayed and
kept saying over and over "thy will be done." It was a terrible outcome and she ended
up going to her first Rehab the next day. Believe it or not- I have grown in how I react
to these times (that was 2007 she has relapsed and lapsed many times since then).
That is what I have to continue to work on- my reaction. Today i read a lot about
"let go and Let God." such a simple five word sentence. Such an amazingly difficult
thing to actually do. I have changed my reaction to the lapses. I have made it safe for
my ASO to call me without me yelling, crying, hanging up or other such non productive
behaviors. This has increased her calling me to know she is safe. I have reminded myself
that I am powerless over my beloved Addicted partner. I have come to these 'rooms' either online or
f2f meetings. That has been very helpful. I read, research and try to continue to grow in areas outside of my
ASO. It is difficult every day. I can tell you love your sibling. Let Go... and send that love to them in whatever way you can. PEACE

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option_firstname: Susan

Re: How Do I Cope With the Not Knowing?

Post by endoftheroad » Tue Jan 03, 2017 2:18 am

Hi there! I am going to move your post to the Forum! You will get more responses there. This posting area is usually for lighter posts!

My name is Susan and I am one of the Moderators! Welcome and keep coming back!
This is the easier softer way.....

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Re: How Do I Cope With the Not Knowing?

Post by melinda2016 » Wed Jan 18, 2017 2:13 pm

Hi & Welcome. My sister has been struggling most of her life. working this program & praying is the only thing that's helped me. I wish I had found this program years ago. I didn't realize how sick Iv become & still am. One of the sayings I try to instill in myself is "Let Go or be dragged" Iv been being dragged by this disease for years sadly I realized I'm the one that's holding on. Work this program-it will help you especially on those days when fear over comes you. As Twhitelightner said yelling & screaming only pushes them away--for me it always feels right at the time then I feel alone & regretful. The book & this forum helps me. I purchased the book on my phone since I'm always on it. Prayers for you & your loved one. Keep coming back

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