Let's talk about our grandchildren!!!

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Re: Let's talk about our grandchildren!!!

Post by Lyra » Sat May 12, 2012 3:51 pm

Im 31 and dont have any kids or grandchildren but I just wanted to say you sound like a fantastic grandma:) My grandmother is 81 and one of the coolest ladies you will ever meet. My cousin transitioned from straight and female to Im not sure and male over the past two years and my grandmother has been vocally supportive of him, despite the fact that she is Roman Catholic and goes to church every sunday and is active in her congregation which is much more conservative than my grannie.

In Belize, where I am from, any older woman may be called Grannie by a younger person (who might be in their 40s) as a sign of respect and deference. I think you definitely deserve some respect and deference. I really appreciate your open minded yet disciplined approach to raising your grandchildren. I grew up in a disciplined household (if you broke the rules, there were consequences-what a concept!) and I dont understand when I meet parents who do not have boundaries for their children. I will say when I was a kid growing up on the farm my brother and I wore the same clothes (he would wear my hand me downs). I had very few "girly" things and didnt want them. I got a machete for my 4th birthday from my dad and I have fond memories of that day because it was so exciting to get my own machete just like an adult. My parents never forced me to wear dresses or bows or do "girly" things. My mother is a feminist and it was a no-barbie household but I didnt want barbies anyways. I wanted a telescope. I wore sports bras only until I was 21 years old. I still prefer pants and shorts over skirts and dresses. 95% of my closest friends are male and I was raised around men and boys. I was called a tomboy by older people and didnt understand what that meant. I just like fishing and exploring and hunting and hiking in the jungle and running around in the jungle and sea just like my friends and my brother-all of whom were boys. In my undergrad years in college and for several years after I identified myself as a "bisexual man in a woman's body". Since then I've embraced the idea of a queer gender continuum instead of a binary model. I respond to "she" and present as a woman but I consider myself in my heart of hearts to be gender-queer and would like to be called she one day and he the next and some gender neutral term the following, but I know that is too much to expect of people and society.

The reason I say all this is because I really appreciate how you support the 6 year old in her gender expression. Let her express herself as she wishes and she will turn out just fine although public school later on may be tough (I was homeschooled for most of my years so I dont know much about that).

Anyways you sound awesome! Its good to know how many rockin' grandmas there are out there. And roller derby is great!

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Re: Let's talk about our grandchildren!!!

Post by Findinghope » Mon Jul 16, 2012 11:45 pm

Mine are so adorable. They have me wrapped around their little pinkies.
You can't think your way into a new way of living . . . you have to live your way into a new way of thinking.

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Re: Let's talk about our grandchildren!!!

Post by Marianne » Fri Jul 20, 2012 9:37 am

My first Grandchild was born in April to my oldest son, who is not my AS, that is my youngest son. She is 3 months old. I really didn't think I would Love being a Grandmom as much as I do. The day she was born and I saw her my whole world changed, I couldn't believe it. Unfortunately she lives in Florida and I live in NJ. I have been to see her twice since she was born and I am going again in August and I can't wait. Her face is what keeps me going when I am having a down day.

I hope my son moves back to NJ, if not I might have to move to Fla because the distance is just not acceptable to me. She is growing so fast and I want to be apart of every week. I can't wait for the end of August to hold her again, are we their yet..LOL.. :D
"Acceptance of what is does not mean liking it as it is." ~ Iyanla Van Zant

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Re: Let's talk about our grandchildren!!!

Post by takenangel » Sat Oct 27, 2012 11:03 pm

We are grandparents to three beautiful grandchildren. My oldest son has two a girl 5 and a boy 1. My middle, whom is a girl has one, she is a girl almost three and we have legal guardianship of her. I love them all equal , but to be honest I feel cheated because I have to be mom and Nana to one which leaves less time for the other two. Starting over was not in our plans. Our youngest child has no children and moved off to go to college. The good news is after a year and a half our AD has cleaned up her act and is now back home being an excellent mom when her daughter will let her be. I know in time she will be the mom her daughter has long depended on me for. I look forward to the day when they can move into a place of their own and I can enjoy time with my husband and other grandchildren one on one. There is alot more to my story but for now. I enjoy life and know that the beautiful blue eyes they all have and their smiles light up my world no matter what. The young and innocent can do that without even trying.

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Re: Let's talk about our grandchildren!!!

Post by DRM » Sat Oct 27, 2012 11:34 pm

I am going to visit my grandson this coming week for his birthday. When I ask him how old he is, he tells me October 30th, the day before Halloween! I keep asking his age and he keeps saying that on the phone. I finally asked J if he knew his age. He said, of course Grandma, I just didn't want you to forget what day I get my party and present!...lol. J will be turning 7 the day before Halloween. My RAS has had custody of him since March of 2009 and is doing a fine job raising his son including weekly therapy sessions over the last year trying to help him with his emotions of his mom "not wanting him." His mom is still in active addition and "forgets" is the word he uses. She forgets to see him sometimes weeks on end. Poor little guy. He is lovable and loves hugging. He is extremely smart for his age. I am proud of both RAS and my grandson because they are working hard at being a family regardless of the addicts and other challenges in their life. The three of us get together and can't quit giggling. Drives my mom nuts! (They currently live with her). Sorry mom! Laughter is good for the heart and soul. No sound is more beautiful especially when I see that laughter sparkling in my grandson's eyes. He has seen and experienced a lot someone his age should not have and it's a blessing to see him with joy in his heart.


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Re: Let's talk about our grandchildren!!!

Post by joshma » Sun Oct 28, 2012 7:38 am

Grandchildren really are the BEST! No matter how dark the day...they keep it real & give me hope. Next month - both of my grandsons celebrate "milestone" birthdays - 6 & 1. They are the joys of my life - and the glue for our family. Dawna - so glad for your wonderful visit with your son & grandson. Love & hugs!

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