Feeling anxious

With the understanding that addiction is a disease and the realization that we are powerless over it as well as over people's lives, we are ready to do something useful and constructive with our own.

Then, and only then can we be of any help to others.

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Hope2018
Posts: 25
Joined: Sat Dec 30, 2017 2:07 pm
option_firstname: Patty

Feeling anxious

Post by Hope2018 » Fri Feb 09, 2018 5:11 pm

My ALO is my older sister. I have been detached from her since Christmas but recently she’s been sending me texts and I’ve slowly been responding to them. I wish I wouldn’t have now though.

Last night she asked if she could stop by to bring her enebalizer to my husband since he has bronchitis and I said yes, she didn’t stay long, she kept her car running so i didn’t get into any big conversation with her. When she left my hubby and i commented how good we thought she looked. This morning i sent her a thank you text and that it was nice of her to do what she did. I haven’t heard anything back from her it’s been 8 hours so my gut feeling that i have has never failed me before.

She is a nanny to a physician in town and I thought, just out of curiosity I’m going to see if the physician has posted to find a new nanny on the site that she found my sister on and she has! I couldn’t believe it, so she’s now lost her job. I know I’m meddling in her business but when my gut tells me I always wish it were wrong.

I’m trying my hardest to put all my hard work to practice from all i put into this program and it has just paralyzed me yet again. I know I have no control, I’m not the cause and I can’t cure this. Im powerless. My Higherpower my God is who I’m praying too, to help me release my anxiety and find peace with all of this.

I’ve feel like I have failed the first test of all the practice I’ve been working on. Attending online meetings, and being involved and reading SESH daily.

Soon my parents will find out on their own as well and the worry it brings them makes me so sad.

Thank you for listening I needed to share my feelings and reach out.

Patty

jp2018
Posts: 11
Joined: Tue Feb 06, 2018 12:10 pm
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Re: Feeling anxious

Post by jp2018 » Fri Feb 09, 2018 6:48 pm

Thank you for reaching out and sharing. I think no matter how well you follow the steps, the reading, the meetings....all of it, that you can ever really sever those DNA ties. So hard to stay detached, so hard to not respond. And SO HARD to turn off your gut! It's family after all, there are ties deeper than we know.

It sounds like you've been doing good work following the 'rules' until now, which means you can get back on track. Don't be too hard on yourself, we're human after all.

Sending thoughts.

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