Sunday (2-4-18) Online Meeting at 8pm EST - Detaching with Love

With the understanding that addiction is a disease and the realization that we are powerless over it as well as over people's lives, we are ready to do something useful and constructive with our own.

Then, and only then can we be of any help to others.

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Sunday (2-4-18) Online Meeting at 8pm EST - Detaching with Love

Post by MissingHim2016 » Sat Feb 03, 2018 10:22 am

Date and time of meeting: Sunday, 2-4-18 at 8pm EST
Topic: Detaching With Love
Discussion leader: MissingHim2016

Excerpts from the January 28th Nar-Anon Daily SESH Reading:

Detaching With Love

Living with an active addict is stressful and I constantly feel as though I am walking on eggs. When I harbor a mistaken sense of responsibility for someone else's well-being and safety, when my sanity and well-being is adversely affected by the actions of the addict, when I find myself worrying and losing sleep because the addict is out partying, when I worry that I may say the wrong thing and "cause" him to go back out, then I am not practicing detachment.

By detaching with love, I can stop feeling responsible for the addict's well-being and behavior. I have learned in Nar-Anon that addiction is a disease. It is not my fault! I didn't cause it, I can't control it, and I can't cure it. I have discovered by practicing detachment that I can relieve myself of the mistaken guilt and responsibility I felt.

Walking on eggs always results in broken eggs. Living with an addict causes stress. I think of detachment as a tight rope and the addict as eggs. I use the tight rope to walk above the eggs. I practice walking on the rope so I will not fall and break the eggs, but walking a tight rope is not easy; it takes a lot of practice. At first, I am sure to make mistakes, to slip and break a few eggs. However, if I practice and learn to walk the rope, I will eventually be able to achieve my goal. The same is true for detachment.

Thought for Today: Detachment is one tool I can use to separate myself from the chaos, fear and mistaken responsibility that result from living with active addiction.

from the Nar-Anon Sharing, Experience, Strength & Hope book.
Copyright © 2007 by Nar-Anon Family Group Headquarters

I have used the tools of Naranon to help me learn how to detach with love.
(i.e. 3 C's: I didn't cause it, I can't control it and I can't cure it.)
I hope you can join me on Sunday 2-4-18 to share what tools help you to detach with love.

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Once the meeting has opened, we only read from or talk about conference approved literature which can be found on the literature order form from WSO at

Anything you hear tonight is strictly our own opinion. The principles of Nar-Anon are found in our Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. If a member says something here that you cannot accept – remember he or she is speaking from their own experience, they are not speaking for Nar-Anon. When you leave our meeting, take home those thoughts that will be most helpful to you, forget those you feel will not be helpful, and keep coming back.

We ask that you speak only as a member of Nar-Anon.

Please read and become familiar with the 12 Steps, Traditions and Concepts and posted under Announcements in the Nar-Anon Family Forum. It it is important to understand the principles of this program.

The following are some important guidelines that will help you get the most out of the meeting.

The meeting today will last between 1 hour and 1-1/2 hours.

If you need to leave the meeting early, please try to leave after an individual has completed their share to minimize interruption.

In Nar Anon meetings, we do not engage in CROSSTALK. Personal progress for the greatest number depends on unity, so we take turns sharing our own experience, strength and hope; we do not interrupt each other or engage in dialogue (either directly or through private messages); we do not put the spotlight on just one member; we do not give advice, offer solutions, or try to rescue one another. we do not offer our personal opinions, criticize or judge anyone.

What is CROSSTALK? It is talking across the group to or with a specific individual. For the purposes of our online meeting, crosstalk refers to interrupting an individual while they are sharing with any typed comment.

It also refers to private messaging between individuals. It is important that we allow everyone the opportunity to engage in the meeting without the distraction of private messages.

By patiently listening, we show respect for each other and our concern for the common welfare of the group. Loving interchange can occur outside the meeting time via one-on-one or group conversations, e-mail, telephone and sponsorship and staying after the meeting for open chat.

To participate and share in the online meeting we follow these guidelines for sharing:

To share, type “!” and wait to be recognized by the discussion leader.

In fairness to all who wish to share today, please keep your sharing to 3 – 5 minutes of typing. Once you are finished sharing, please type “done” so we are aware you have concluded your share.

To avoid any crosstalk, advice or feedback when an individual has completed their share and allow time for all who wish to share today, please limit your responses to a simple TYFS and a few brief kind words of recovery related support and encouragement.

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Re: Sunday (2-4-18) Online Meeting at 8pm EST - Detaching with Love

Post by MissingHim2016 » Sun Feb 04, 2018 4:56 pm


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