The Dark Months

With the understanding that addiction is a disease and the realization that we are powerless over it as well as over people's lives, we are ready to do something useful and constructive with our own.

Then, and only then can we be of any help to others.

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vscook
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The Dark Months

Post by vscook » Mon Dec 18, 2017 10:44 am

Winter is always really hard for me. I can feel myself sliding toward depression as the days become shorter and shorter. I tend to "hole up" and isolate during the winter. My husband was hospitalized in December five years ago, and he passed away one month later. My AD went to inpatient rehab last November and walked out after one week. She started outpatient rehab in December, but stopped going after a few months. The stress of spending the holidays with my family of origin does not help either. Not trying to be a whiny, cry baby - just trying to be aware, so I can stop myself from going to that deep, dark hole I tend to crawl into. Time for radical self-care!
Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift, that's why it's called the present.

DeanW
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Re: The Dark Months

Post by DeanW » Mon Dec 18, 2017 10:49 am

I hear you. Winter always affected me that way. I lived in FL for many years and liked that I didn't focus on it so much. It sort of took the mystery of "the dark months" away. I still sort of feel it (now that I live in winter weather) but it's not as bad anymore. You know the answer - you said it...."radical self care" - it works...:)

Dannie
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Re: The Dark Months

Post by Dannie » Mon Dec 18, 2017 6:34 pm

It's definitely hard around the holidays. I havent had my AS home for the holidays in two years. Its hard when we all take pictures and play games and hes absent. I know when he is in active addiction he said he cant be around the family. This year he is in rehab so I will go see him there and that's fine! I am so glad I know he's safe and not using right now but I do understand the feeling of overwhelming sadness during the winter months.

I play Christmas music, bake, and stay busy. It does help. Maybe you have some hobbies you like to do. An idle mind is the devil's playground they say. I dont want to give in to that so I work my steps and stay active. Best wishes to you.

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hopefulNE
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Re: The Dark Months

Post by hopefulNE » Tue Dec 19, 2017 2:02 am

Vicki,
The darkness and the holidays always take their toll on me too. Over the years I have scaled back and given up on those Hallmark holidays that only happened in my imagination anyway. I try to do what will nurture MY soul. Cut out the excess and spend time doing what is meaningful.
You are not alone in the darkness, we are here, and we get it.
TYFS,
Pat
"Keep Calm and Carry On" - British Ministry of Information, WWII

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