I am worried about my sister.

With the understanding that addiction is a disease and the realization that we are powerless over it as well as over people's lives, we are ready to do something useful and constructive with our own.

Then, and only then can we be of any help to others.

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M4r14M
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Joined: Fri Nov 10, 2017 8:38 am
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I am worried about my sister.

Post by M4r14M » Fri Nov 10, 2017 8:34 pm

My sister is 23 she has had history with drugs but I never thought it reached the point of addiction. Recently my dad got her to get some blood tests done because she is been unwell for a while, he found out through the tests that she was using drugs. He had a talk with her and set up an appointment with a doctor who deals with people with drug addiction. She told my dad that she didnt want to live this way and that her bestfriend was using to and they both were scared and wanted to tell someone to get help. The doctor prescribed her medication that helps detox the body and due to patient confidentiality he didn't tell my dad what she was using. He insisted that we avoid letting her leave the house and if possible for the next while to not let her go to uni. He stressed on the fact that we needed to watch her carefully at all times and whatever drug she was taking was expensive so not to give her money.
Anyhow, it has been two days since she started taking what the doctor has prescribed and she hasnt been leaving her room, until we call her down for meals. We have been trying as hard as possible not to leave her alone.
I am worried about three aspects: firstly, the way we should deal with her should we be more affectionate or do what exactly, secondly, she is very manipulative so how do we deal with the lies, third she spends a long time in the bathroom the assumption is she is smoking (my parents are really comfortable with her smoking in the house), although it is not as frequent as it used to be. For thr past couple of months she would stay for hours in the bathroom, but today she went in 4-5 times and was there for 15-20 mins.
Thank you :)

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SDIN2T
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Re: I am worried about my sister.

Post by SDIN2T » Fri Nov 10, 2017 8:58 pm

During the brief times my wife and 2 sons found sobriety, I couldn't manage or control it. It was up to them to own their recovery. Ironically, before recovery my sons would spend a lot of time in the bathroom. During recovery, they didn't.

:JR
And so rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life - JK Rowling

MarieW
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Re: I am worried about my sister.

Post by MarieW » Sat Nov 11, 2017 6:43 pm

Welcome to the Forum. I've been in the position of trying to be jailer, sponsor, therapist, probation officer, whatever to an adult drug addict. It was a disaster. One thing that has sunk in after years of trying to get my son clean is that trying to control his behavior did not work. Watching him constantly and locking him up just isn't sustainable. It is an unreasonable expectation of me (I have a life, too). I get very angry and resentful. And it sets him up for failure. Eventually he has to go into the real world. When my son is serious about getting and staying clean, he takes responsibility for his recovery. When he isn't, he doesn't and soon relapses. Neither seems to be affected by anything I do or don't do.

The best advice I can give you and your parents is to find a Nar-Anon or Al-Anon meeting in your area and go. We also have on-line meetings here several times a week. Read the posts under "Announcements" for more info.

Dealing with addiction in the family is too much for most of us to do alone. The good news it, we don't have to.

Keep coming back.
The only wrong way to work this program is to not work it.

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